How to Get More Done by Pretending You’re About to be Spanked

30 Jun
The hours leading up to a spanking are spent in frenzied doing. I get more done on those weekly occasions than I accomplish the other six days combined. Sinks shine. Fresh sheets are installed on the bed. Eyebrows are magically plucked. Vacuuming, dusting, exfoliating, primping all happen in a matter of hours.
I’m no slouch on a day-to-day basis, but when I’m expecting a spanking, I become an efficient machine.
So how do I channel this nervous energy every day, when a spanking is a far-off prospect?
Here’s my plan:
1. Get several life-size cardboard cut-outs of my Dom. Place them in high traffic areas. He should be holding a paddle or something likewise menacing.

Probably not with a sword. Unless that's your thing.

2. Some people get revved by playing music. Instead I will record the sound of belt removal and a spanking and play it on the stereo while cleaning. This audio is a good starting point.
3. Currently my bath brush is in my toy bag. A better place for it would be in my shower: hurry! faster! scrub, scrub, shave!

I'll see that bath brush hanging in the shower and think of this.

4. Imagination is a powerful thing. I will write a script of a fantasy spanking and fine-tune my part while vacuuming. “I didn’t want to be the one to tell you that you needed a cane, Sir. However, I have noticed you slowing down over the last few months.” That will be fine-tuned to, “Catch me if you can!”
5. I’ll think about what will happen if he arrives to find me as I am: disorderly and frantic. This may prove detrimental to cleaning as it might inspire me to live in disarray while I wait for his brand of motivation. Revision — pretend that I didn’t clean while I’m cleaning.
So there you have it, my step-by-step plan for domestic goddesshood. Eat your heart out, Good Housekeeping.

17 Responses to “How to Get More Done by Pretending You’re About to be Spanked”

  1. Hedone June 30, 2011 at 9:52 pm #

    I supposed I should read the words, but I was taken with the lovely soapy lathered ass. Very nice.


    • Barely Pink July 1, 2011 at 7:06 am #

      Favorite. Picture. Ever. Well, not ever. Maybe fav pic of the day?

      What was it about men being visual creatures?

  2. Erica June 30, 2011 at 10:07 pm #

    I am properly impressed. And yes, it’s quite amazing how efficient we are when in pre-spanking mode!

    • Barely Pink July 1, 2011 at 7:07 am #

      Lots of hurrying and scurrying just so we look all cool and casual when they arrive. I probably shouldn’t let that secret out, huh?

  3. Michael June 30, 2011 at 10:16 pm #

    Efficacy, thy name is pre-spanking energy. Miss Pink, you are not only a domestic goddess but a spanko goddess as well.

    And thanks for linking to your old audio post. I had forgotten how lovely that was. What a lovely revisit.

    • Barely Pink July 1, 2011 at 7:08 am #

      I almost didn’t link to that old post. And now I know why — it seriously makes me blush knowing that people listen. Eep.

  4. Lea July 1, 2011 at 2:03 am #

    Sounds like a good plan to me!

    • Barely Pink July 1, 2011 at 7:15 am #

      Of course, our neighbors may wonder at the sounds of spanking if we leave our windows open.

  5. Zelle July 1, 2011 at 4:11 am #

    You are just too damned funny for your own good! LOL – It was fun to hear your voice and D’s voice again.. loved that “Love Our Lurkers” audio blog!

    (“eat your heart out Good Housekeeping”… ROFLMAO)

    • Barely Pink July 1, 2011 at 7:15 am #

      Didn’t we talk about an audio contest, Zelle? I know you did an audio post fairly recently, too.

  6. D July 1, 2011 at 9:21 am #

    Vanilla’s are motivated AFTER the spanking, Spanko’s are motivated BEFORE. Makes you wonder if punishment is 40 swats or ONLY 40 swats….

  7. steve July 1, 2011 at 11:10 pm #

    why not arrange to get a daily spanking.

  8. Rod The Canery Author July 11, 2011 at 12:11 am #

    Haha, very good. I think we’ve all been there…

  9. wordsmith July 11, 2011 at 3:26 am #

    Loved the audio, you and D are so perfect together. As others said, your voice matches your writing – beautiful.

    • Barely Pink July 11, 2011 at 9:30 am #

      Aww…shucks, Wordsmith. Thank you from the bottomest of my Midwestern-accented heart. 🙂

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