8 Dec

In my group of friends, I’ve always been known as the sexually charged one.
As open as I am within that tight-knit group, I’ve only hinted at my kinkiness, leaving them with the impression that I’m “dirty” and “uninhibited” in bed.
During a girls’ night years ago, I bemoaned my dwindling sex life after my boyfriend moved in. “We’re only doing it five times a week,” I complained.
Looking back, I understand why they rolled their eyes. I sounded like the nympho Samantha from Sex and the City.

I once told them how I’d made a teen cashier do a price check on KY jelly. (I may have scarred the boy for life, but it was a $2 difference!) That story led to uncomfortable questions and confessions about “butt sex”, as they eloquently put it.
When my best friend from college’s even more straight-laced sister was relocated for work, she stayed with me for a few months. Accustomed to living alone, I unwittingly left my water-proof vibrator on the edge of the Jacuzzi tub after a particularly bubbly session. She told her sister about it, and after an awkward laugh, my friend became acquainted with the fact that I owned more than one pleasure tool.
Those things I can admit. But I could never direct them to The Pink Report. They don’t need to know that much about me.

One night though, I spilled my secret spanking desire to one of my closest friends.
As she described her Halloween costume — a naughty schoolgirl uniform, complete with regulation panties — I inwardly rejoiced at the thought of a kindred spirit within my group. Aren’t schoolgirl uniforms particular to our kink?
Fueled with Bloody Marys, I blurted, “Do you like to be spanked?”
I instantly knew the answer was no. The look on her face was not one of mortification at a secret revealed, but one of utter confusion.

Instead of abandoning my cause, I bumbled forward.
“‘Cuz, you know, the whole thing with ‘naughty’ schoolgirls…they usually need spankings.”
“You mean, during sex?” She asked, still perplexed. “Yeah, I like a few spanks while he’s doing me from behind. Do you?”
This, again, would have been a good time to abandon the subject.
“Oh yeah,” I said, insistent on revealing myself. “But not just during sex.”

Awkward pause.
“I have a video if you’d like to see…,” I offered, quickly adding, “I mean, um, not of me. But a video that I like.”
You could hear the ticking of my mantel clock while she pretended to consider it, her lips twisting in discomfort.
“Nooo. But I am into asphyxiation,” she said, high on her own confession.
Oh my god, I thought. She is way more extreme than I am!

“Okay,” I said. “I’ll keep your secret if you’ll keep mine.”
As it turns out, you never really know what your friends, even the best of them, do behind closed doors.
And I rather like it that way.

36 Responses to “Revelation”

  1. Brett December 8, 2010 at 11:31 am #

    I’m glad she shared her secret with you. I think people who are into something very unconventional will at least be understanding of other kinks. I’m not turned on by asphyxiation, but I feel some measure of kinship with people who have fetishes. I actually like that spanking isn’t mainstream. It’s much more exciting to share in intimacy. Spanking isn’t a subject I bring up with anyone in the normal course of life—too awkward.

    Being sexually charged and kinky is a blessing. It certainly makes your blogging a treat for us readers. 😉 XO

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 12:05 pm #

      Brett, exactly. I was relieved when she made her own confession, evening the playing field a little. She doesn’t judge me and I don’t judge her. But we don’t talk about it anymore, either. 🙂

      I, too, enjoy having this secret thing. I like that people have no idea the depths of my kinkiness, just a small question mark. It’s something that I can call my own. You know?

  2. D December 8, 2010 at 12:17 pm #

    Pink, I don’t care if the door is open or closed. That’s the kind of thinking that vanilla types do.

    I’m more interested in how to use the door frame, say with eye-bolts in the corners to restrain your hands and feet. 🙂

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 7:33 pm #

      Mmmm…sounds promising. Your door frame or mine?

  3. Sierra December 8, 2010 at 12:36 pm #

    Oh this made me giggle and hold my breath to hear her response! I’ve been lucky enough to be able to be open with my friends about my kinkiness. I’ve never shown them my blogs.. but have talked about them. I’m with you… there are just some things that are best kept a secret. I think especially the whole D/s aspect of our life now.. they wouldn’t understand. I told one of my friends that it was my job to clean the house… and I didn’t mean it as it wasn’t Ben’s too… but as in no one else is going to come and clean it. But she looked at me like I grew a third eye.. heaven forbid women choose to have traditional rolls in their relationship! Wasn’t women’s lib about being able to decide how you wanted to live your life… not having it decided for you? I guess not 🙂

    I’m known as the kinky freak to them.. but I tell them I wave my freak flag proudly! I think its funny the things they can accept and understand opposed to the ones they can’t.

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 7:35 pm #

      “…heaven forbid women choose to have traditional rolls in their relationship! Wasn’t women’s lib about being able to decide how you wanted to live your life…not having it decided for you?”

      Amen, sister.

      If I want to stay home and bake cookies while wearing nothing but an apron and a butt plug, so be it. 😛

  4. Phoenix December 8, 2010 at 1:45 pm #

    You really know how to make a guy want to ravage someone… The bit about your friend’s kink left me breathless.

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 7:37 pm #

      Well, well, well. Look who showed up on my blog. Good to have you here, old friend, spreading your hilarity to my blogging space. 🙂

  5. Ronniesoul December 8, 2010 at 3:49 pm #

    I enjoy having this little secret. I couldn’t bring up ttwd do with any of my friends I know it would make them feel very awkward. They wouldn’t understand.

    Love the post Pink.


    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 7:42 pm #

      Yes, the silence is a killer for everyone involved and I’d rather not go there either. After that night, I set a limit of 3 Bloody Marys…more than that and they become “Boldy” Marys, and I don’t need boldness with the secrets I keep!

      Thanks, Ronnie!

  6. Erica December 8, 2010 at 4:03 pm #

    I could feel that discomfort, just reading about it!

    This is why I keep the spanko stuff to myself around vanillas (the few remaining who I know; most of my friends these days are spankos). They don’t get it, they won’t get it, and I don’t need people thinking I’m even more weird than they thought I was.

    Say what you will about our fetish — as least it can’t accidentally kill us!

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 7:48 pm #

      I have to admit that I’ve held my breath during sex before and it intensifies the experience. But I just couldn’t risk death for an orgasm.

      (I’m making no judgments here, before anyone jumps in. Just not my thing.)

      More power to my friend, though, for having an open mind. I can certainly respect that. And we’re sort of like sisters in kink now — different kinks, but a nice little secret.

  7. scarlet December 8, 2010 at 6:07 pm #

    Wonderful, Pink! I probably seem more happily sexual than some of my friends, but they have to wonder what it is that Roman and I have together that keeps our spark alive. I’ll never tell.

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 7:50 pm #

      Yeah, I occasionally get asked if the sex is good between D and I. I just smile and say, “You have no idea.”

      I don’t want to tell other people how to live their lives, but a kinky sex life would rejuvenate so many relationships, if they could just get past the perceived stigma.

  8. Em December 8, 2010 at 8:17 pm #

    A couple of years ago a childhood friend of mine confessed to me that she liked to wear schoolgirl outfits during sex. She was *so* nervous that I was going to think she was a freak, but of course I just smiled and told her that sounded just fine to me. I didn’t take the opportunity to share my kinks with her though 😉

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 8:57 pm #

      That was a wise choice, I think, Em. I guess I just have spanko-vision when it comes to schoolgirl outfits — or I did. I guess vanillas like to be schoolgirls, too!

  9. steve December 8, 2010 at 9:06 pm #

    preach it sister pink preach it well my bedroom, dungeon, or hidden place in the woods is my business, nobody else’s. Life can be hard enough without the pestering of the small minded. Though once my wife and I showed up at the same lub at the same time as her very prim and proper boss where they knew the boss lady a lot better than us(hilarity ensued).

    hope this finds you well.

    • Barely Pink December 8, 2010 at 9:35 pm #

      Oh, wow. Interesting. At least your wife had the inside track on what to get the boss for Christmas. 😉

  10. Raven Red December 8, 2010 at 10:37 pm #

    This was brilliant! I have had quite a couple of these conversations where you see the hole gaping, and getting wider – but unable to stop yourself. Or worse, trying to change direction, but failing miserably….obviously, my last experience trying to explain a tawse away to very perturbed family members.



    • Barely Pink December 9, 2010 at 9:49 am #

      I would have liked very much to have heard your explanation to your family members. You are far braver than I. I would have given the tawse up as a lost cause!



  11. Michael December 8, 2010 at 10:56 pm #

    I was so nervous for you, Pink, when you revealed yourself to your friend, but then it turns out she’s a gasper. It is something I wonder about when with a group of people, everyone is different and unique and I bet most have some sort of kink which we would never ever suspect. I believe when you add up all the different kinks on one side and pure vanilla on the other the kinks would be the majority and vanilla in the minority. And, Pink, even in our community I think you come down on the “uninhibited” side of the ledger, and that is meant as a compliment. 🙂

    And I am guilty of the same narrow spanko-vision when it comes to adult girls in schoolgirl uniforms. Schoolgirl uniform=naughty schoolgirl=spanked schoolgirl

    • Barely Pink December 9, 2010 at 9:52 am #

      A “gasper”! I had not heard the expression, but I do love it!

      Me? Uninhibited? Whatever gave you that impression? 😉 (And, yes, I take it as a compliment.)

      Oh, I should have definitely noted the ADULT part of the schoolgirl uniform. I do hope that everyone sees that as an assumed description.

  12. Veronica December 9, 2010 at 7:14 am #

    LMAO! at that one. Beleive it or not spanking happens to be one of the most practiced fetish among couples. I just loved that story, it made my day. xoxo!

    • Barely Pink December 9, 2010 at 9:55 am #

      I have heard that before, but surely those stats indicate mild spanking play? Like a little slap and tickle during sex? I know that most of my friends have no idea about the wide world of spanking, in the discipline sense, and consider it just another sensation to have during actual intercourse.

      Happy you enjoyed my embarrassment, Veronica. 🙂

  13. Kate December 9, 2010 at 9:24 am #

    Pink – your story made me nervous for you! I’m so private that my vanilla friends don’t even ask if I’m dating anyone, lol. I can’t imagine telling them anything about ttwd though. You’re much braver than I am. 🙂

    • Barely Pink December 9, 2010 at 9:57 am #

      To be honest, I rather like the reputation I have among my friends. If any of them has an indelicate question, they feel free to ask me about it (and I love, love hearing details as I am quite the voyeur). However, this confession was above and beyond the norm. I offered her a video?! What the f&#k was I thinking? 😛

  14. Michael December 10, 2010 at 8:42 am #

    Pink, big, huge congratulations on this post being Chrossed! That is so cool, Now you can do your celebratory dance. YAY! I think it is doubly satisfying because the post concerns your deep, intimate feelings. Excellent, Excellent, Excellent. 🙂

  15. Michael December 10, 2010 at 8:43 am #

    Oops, misspelled my own email address. LOL

    • Barely Pink December 10, 2010 at 9:30 am #

      Oh! Ha, it’s you!

      Thanks so much, Michael! I’ll be doing my own sort of dance this evening, over a set of knees. Now that’s a celebration. 🙂

      Have a great weekend!



  16. Hedone December 10, 2010 at 12:21 pm #


    1. I am going to be a naughty school girl for a NYE party.
    2. I love to be spanked (okay that’s not news)
    3. I recently tried light breath play and liked it.

    I don’t confess any of my kinks to vanilla friends. They couldn’t handle it and most are judgemental in one way or another.

  17. Barely Pink December 10, 2010 at 12:30 pm #

    Hey, Hedone! I miss you…I need to get back over to your blog. Since I made the switch, I don’t have a rolling update list anymore, so I feel isolated over here. 😛

    1. You will rock the house with your costume, I’m sure. Are you going to bring along a ruler? You should…just in case.
    2. Sing it, sister.
    3. You did? Do tell! (I like hearing about this, but my first concern is always, “do you trust the man implicitly?”)

    Some of my friends are a bit judgmental, but for the most part I’m fortunate. I’m just known as their crazy friend, ______.



  18. C April 22, 2011 at 7:22 am #

    About a year ago I was on the phone with my oldest, closest, very vanilla (or so I thought) friend. I asked her what she was doing and she said, “Looking for new porn. I can’t find any good bondage videos.” I didn’t give it time to be awkward. “Oh I have one.” I said. And for the next 2 hours we sat on the phone sending each other links. It was great to be open with her and I loved how much we both opened up and after that conversation we never brought it up again.

    • Barely Pink April 22, 2011 at 9:17 am #

      That is wonderful that she admitted to searching for bondage videos.

      My vanilla-ish friend and I don’t discuss our revelations, either, although she knows I have a “dirty blog”, as she calls it. She just doesn’t know which one.


  1. Red Herring « The Pink Report - April 21, 2011

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