Farewell to E.d.

23 Jun

I should be embarrassed about what I’m going to admit, but I guess I’m past the point of shame with you, readers.
 
For the past few months I’ve been having trouble with my DVR. The problems only occur at night when I’m watching my recorded shows in bed. The DVR locks up and I need to reset the whole thing, only to have it happen again minutes later. I’ve been a pretty dissatisfied customer.
 
Last week the good folks at AT&T came out to examine their equipment but could find nothing wrong. The bewildered technician stayed for awhile trying to recreate the issue, but eventually shrugged his shoulders and scribbled down his cell phone number, telling me to call him directly if the problem persisted.
 
That same night, the issue happened again. A few nights later found me yelling at the box and stamping my feet, pondering the tech’s cell phone number and thinking about calling him in the morning.
 
Well, last night, it finally dawned on me.


I was watching my recorded “How I Met Your Mother”, and the DVR froze. So, I turned off my Hitachi Magic Wand (yes, this is the embarrassing part) to get out of bed, and it unfroze. I laid back to enjoy the show and the lulling vibrations, and it froze again. A few more clicks of my vibrator, and I started to notice a correlation. Vibrator on, DVR malfunctions. Vibrator off, DVR functions.
 
After checking another outlet, I realized the power of E.d. (Electric Delight, aka the Hitachi) was too great to enjoy TV and get off at the same time.
 
So, E.d., here is your notice: you are officially shelved. I am reconciling with B.o.b. (aka Battery Operated Boyfriend) immediately because missing my HIMYM episodes is too great a sacrifice.
 
It’s been fun, but a girl must have priorities.
 

6 Responses to “Farewell to E.d.”

  1. command June 23, 2010 at 7:38 am #

    Ed is a very dominant machine, insisting on your full attention! Or perhaps a kinky engineer taught a clapper how to vibrate? Let us know if using BOB works like a remote channel changer!

  2. Anonymous June 23, 2010 at 1:13 pm #

    HAHAHA! I love it! Too funny.FH

  3. HEDONE June 26, 2010 at 9:38 am #

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!That is shameful. So tell me, you aren't able to watch tv and NOT masturbate? Just askin'.-HP.S. I want you to call the Tech and tell him you solved the problem; make sure to disclose the issue.

  4. AboutSpankings June 26, 2010 at 11:30 am #

    lol… our vacuum cleaner does the same thing (well, it shuts the TV off). The easy fix is to plug it into a different outlet. Of course, the vacuum cleaner has long cord, which probably isn't the case for ED. There HAS to be a solution other than the self though. Maybe call the tech back out and share the newly learned details.;)~Todd & Suzyamericanspankingsociety.com

  5. barely.pink June 26, 2010 at 12:02 pm #

    Hedone: I am a woman of limited time so I must multi-task my pleasures. ;)Todd & Suzy: I have tried multiple outlets and multiple rooms. (Blush) All have the same result…so it's batteries from here on out, unfortunately. Or an electrical upgrade.The thought of calling the tech did occur to me. You know, in the name of helpful advice. "For future reference, you may ask the homeowner if she owns a Hitachi Magic Wand, because it apparently interferes with TV reception." I'd gladly take one for the team, but that might be a bit hard to eek out. 🙂

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Hitachi Magic Wand (answer is in the question…MAGIC) | I'm only doing this to get spanked. - March 28, 2011

    […] time. There’s a reason you see it used in porn videos: IT WORKS!     UPDATE: The Hitachi and my DVR do not seem to coexist happily. I cannot watch my recorded programs while enjoying the company of […]

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